Here at 16 Style Types, we are big believers in wearing clothing that makes you feel great. The ideal scenario is clothing that makes you both look and feel great, and to experience your style as deeply authentic for you.
Our response to and attitude about compliments can come into our style at this juncture. Perhaps you are dressing unconsciously or consciously to attract compliments, and so you’re setting ourselves up to feel affirmed or disappointed if you don’t get them (or don’t get them in the way you wish to receive them).
Or perhaps there’s an internal sense of conflict with how you’re dressing and presenting yourself and how you feel inside. So if you do receive a compliment, it jars, doesn’t feel right, perhaps you feel you don’t ‘deserve’ it.
Compliments often crop up as problematic when there’s something blocking our ability to dress authentically, when we’re at odds with our style in some significant way. You can make better choices once you are aware of what’s getting in the way of your authentic style — and you can put the opinions of others in their rightful place, too — whether that’s a curious raising of the eyebrow signalling uncertainty or even disapproval of your style, or compliments on every outfit you put together.
In this series of posts where we explore the Super Styles, we’ll be taking the responses to our Facebook post questions about style and sharing them with you, grouped by Super Style, to illustrate the way that each of the Super Styles goes about style — these are the responses of real women experience their real style in real time.
The Super Styles are a great way to look at your style, and it’s a great way to organize the responses to these intriguing style questions. There’s only four groups, instead of the 16 Style Types so you stand back and take a big picture look at how you’re approaching your style through the lens of these four fabulous Styles: the SF Style Aesthetician, the ST Style Pragmatist, the NT Style Strategist, and the NF Style Dreamer.
How important are compliments about your style to you?
The Style Strategist – iNtuition and Thinking (NT)
- I don’t expect them or dress for them, but when they come, I’m surprised and really chuffed. My most memorable one was when a patient said, “You always look so elegant.” – I was shocked. I don’t think I do (perhaps occasionally), but it made me feel wonderful. (INTP)
- If it’s my husband, I think he’s just biased! I pretty much feel awkward with any compliments based on my physical appearance. So, they are unimportant. (INTP)
- I think the best compliment I got was when someone suggested that I might be the person to ask about clothing colors and flattering styles. Other than that I think it’s mostly a lack of “You look so tired today” when I’m wearing the wrong palette. (INTP)
- Surprising and heartwarming, but not important. (INTP)
Read more about the NT Style Strategist Super Style here.
The Style Aesthetician – Sensing and Feeling (SF)
- I like compliments, but don’t like too many where I become the center of attention. I most likely will never wear that item again if it’s been criticized. (ISFJ)
- When I was on holiday a lady said “You look gorgeous in that dress – it’s a lovely colour!” I was pleased that someone noticed the colour suited me. (ISFJ)
- Compliments are not nearly as impacting and long-lasting as criticisms. (ISFJ)
- I don’t know if it’s important or just makes me feel good that my efforts are noticed and appreciated. (ESFJ)
- I live in a country where people don’t often give compliments at all. It was pretty jarring at first, but now I can see it in their eyes when they appreciate how I look. It’s so nice to be appreciated, and I really miss verbal compliments! (ISFJ)
- A compliment is a wonderful way to have a style chat with a stranger, which can make my day! (ESFP)
- Compliments tend to matter to me, especially from the random person I don’t know. They can really make my day, just as criticism will usually bring me down. (ISFJ)
- I love receiving compliments on my outfits — I’ve always put some energy into creating that day’s ensemble so it’s terrific when someone appreciates it! (ESFJ)
Read more about the SF Style Aesthetician Super Style here.
The Style Dreamer – iNtuition and Feeling (NF)
- I don’t seek them out, but it’s lovely when I get them – it makes me feel I’m doing something right. (INFJ)
- It’s nice, but I don’t expect them or dwell on it. (INFP)
- They are important to me. I like the outside validation that something I’ve done is getting noticed in a good way. (ENFJ)
- Like ‘em but don’t hafta have ‘em. (ENFP)
- Not at all. I dress for me not others. (ENFP)
- I really like it when the compliments say something like “You looks so good in this” rather than “I like your outfit”. I want them to see me as a person not as a clothes horse. (ENFP)
Read more about the NF Style Dreamer Super Style here.
The Style Pragmatist – Sensing and Thinking (ST)
- Generally speaking compliments are not important to me. But I did get one once saying I looked strong and sexy and smart/capable, and that was music to my ears! (ESTJ)
Read more about the ST Style Pragmatist Super Style here.
Further reading
How Do You Like to Be Complimented?
Get the Full Details on Your Style Type in Your Style Type Report
Your Super Style gives you the broad strokes – your Style Type Report gives you the details you need to really make a shift in your style, including how you think and feel about your style, and what your style motivators are.
If you are already know your four-letter type, click here to get your Style Type report. If you are not 100% sure of your four-letter type, believe you may have been mistyped in the past, or simply wish to take a fresh look at what makes you, you – discover your Style Type here.
